I don't know about you guys, but 8 out of 10 times when I want to shoot someone, I'm both drunk and in a bar, so I've been really excited to read lately how several intrepid legislatures in progressive states like Virginia, Tennessee and Georgia, have been working hard alongside the altruistic NRA to make it legal for people to carry concealed firearms into their favorite watering holes.
I mean, you never know when someone is going to disrespect your woman or step on your new snakeskin boots. Sometimes, someone will just look at your wrong and you just shake your head and slur to yourself, "Motherfugger, IschwearI'llfuggin'killyou, jush you wait." And now you won't have to wait, or even worse, be forced to resort to such kitsch as a broken bottle, barstool to the head, or barbaric fisticuffs. I mean, this is the 21st century, and we are stylish vigilantes!
But, let's look at this another way, because, like Gandhi, I don't always want to shoot every motherfucker in the room. For those who worry that allowing people to carry firearms into bars, airports, schools, dentist offices, churches, funeral parlors, petting zoos, nursing homes or PTA meetings will turn society into a violent, lawless pandemonium like the wild west, let me be the first to tell you that the old west wasn't nearly violent enough. It's all talk. Even infamous Tombstone, Arizona had strict gun laws demanding that folk surrender their firearms. And that was the problem! In fact, it was these fascist, anti-american, anti-gun laws that led to the legendary gunfight at the O.K. Corral. If that's not an argument for letting people carry guns wherever and whenever the fuck they want I don't know what is. They don't call 'em peacekeepers for nothing. Yahoo!
So, either way. If you're pro shooting people in bars or con, you still need to support this important legislation, because when I'm half in the bag, slurring, stumbling, angry and ready to shoot someone, if you try to take my gun away, it might just be you!
Actually, I don't really give a fuck because when I go to bars I take my claymore and then you know you're shit out of luck!
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